“The sex was great. No, beyond great…it was fantastic. It was beyond anything I have ever experienced before in my life. And I want to do it again, I really do, but? Right now? Well…I’m a man, and? There’s a bit of a slight refractory period going on for me right now…and you know what I’m saying, right? Let’s get back to it in a moment…” Has there ever been an experience like this for you before?  Well? It has happened for me. A majority of my day in public was about fending off the elite, gallant wind-pissers who demonstrated their arrogance and lack of charisma around me just wanting that moment of her time. I knew the moment they were seeking. I knew exactly what that moment was for me: magical.  I had to protect it at all costs…But after a few years of commitment, it got exhausting.  The moment afterwards, however? After sex was a big, “Oh yeah,” moment.  After the sexual experience had to come to an end it was a big, “Now what?” “Is this all we are?” “If it is, then what are we?” “How is this going to sustain itself in the big picture?” For me? I had to know who I was again. I needed space that we weren’t able to give one another. I knew life was short, but there were so many important questions I had left to answer for myself like: what was my initial purpose in life? What did I want to achieve? What was my initial intention before we started this…uhm…this? This what?—Huh? Interesting how that relationship-thing works then, isn’t it?  One minute you can be two-hot bodies smacking down on each other and crashing like the waves on a shore, but then? The tides shift and change and every story you’ve ever been told about relationships having only a next minute of wondering where the boat was docked.

    Relationships, in my opinion, have become a cluster-funk of CARNAL intrusions. The carnal mind—the “lower-mind,” as it is referred to as by some experts, is filled with lustful, jealous, angry and spiteful aggressions and behaviors. The human brain is fooled into fulfilling on finishing the pathway of passion and eventually creating an expansive highway for its dominance over an individual. Society is jam-packed with conclusions that highlight the importance of external beauty and so it is no wonder why we fall so fast and so hard for one another.       

   Our external appearances are only one quick and easy route towards adding value to each other’s lives. But then? That moment comes and it’s back to square one—ground zero again. There wasn’t much discussion of what either person would do afterwards—go back to their lives again I guess then, right? Well?…if you are looking to be in a long-term relationship with another individual a few basic things about each other should be understood.  Here are a list of questions that I would consider asking (not in any particular order, so read through them all and use your due diligence) if the conversation of bringing value to the relationship comes up for long-term support that might be the right path for you: 

1. What is your intended future looking like? You want to know where they stand for a future outcome. It might not always be relevant to where they are at the moment, but it is important to understand what sort of direction and game-plan they are preparing for. Someone who wants to stay in their home-town versus someone who wants to become a famous actor might not want to consider getting involved due to a career-path conflict.

2. What are you about creating for yourself and your future? You’re going to want to know that they have an established head on their shoulders outlook on life. It doesn’t have to be perfect, but at least they are thinking about creating something in the first place. It might even be as intricate as we get on this website with our thought “Tracks.” It’s not perfect but it is steering towards something beautiful.

3. What do you envision me adding to your life in order to support your prospective future growth? You want to get clear on where the other person interprets your place in their life. Are you at the highest of high’s, or will you simply be needed as another cog in the wheel?

4. What is your relationship like with your father? Your mother? Your siblings? You’re going to want this information because it will help you understand a person’s decision-making methods and strategies. Everyone has a story to tell and no single one of them will ever be perfect, but it will tell you a lot about what and how and where to manage yourself along the way.

5. Do you envision having/desiring a family of your own? This is also a futuristic “biggie.” It will wake another person up and begin considering you as a different type of relationship. Be sure to know where you stand on this one too!

6. What is your interpretation of God/Higher Power/Source/Creator like? This question really brings out an individual’s level of imaginative capabilities. This is an interpretation and must be handled with extreme levels of compassion and care. It is, nevertheless, a very interesting share to offer perspective on for another individual.

   SECRET SUGGESTION: Lucky you for sticking around. Here goes: Want to know how intelligent your date is? Consider asking the other person to draw a circle on a piece of paper either by pen or with pencil. The more perfect the circle is? The smarter they are according to a recent study by psychosomatic scientists at the University of Berlin, 2002. Main take-away? Be gentle. Be kind and compassionate to one another. Love is not built on one leg. Have fun.

    These are important questions to consider and also to gain the adequate level of insight into the value-added component of bringing another person on-board your ship. Men? Women? Go with strength in understanding yourself. Grab a free consultation and discover a program that will benefit you along your journey of individuation: creating your life by empowered design.  That’s the fast track of elevation we are here for. Be well.

-Dick

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